“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” ~James 1: 2-3
It has been said about finding a life partner “When you know, you just know.” Well, here I am, one month after meeting and one week of spending time with my “I just know”. Of course this is still in the early stages of us getting to know each other, and developing a deep friendship, and it’s always entirely possible that this is my “I just know” for now, and not forever. Either way, I have been learning to enjoy the moment, and I am 100% fully invested in enjoying every moment of this.
But, I also think there is more to it than a feeling or “just knowing”. For instance, I truly believe a person must be able to find happiness and acceptance within themselves. They should rely only on their relationship with God before a third person (if you will) can be added to this already strong foundation. That person must also already be completely self-dependent and co-dependent on God.
We all develop a sort of “check list” in our heads of what we are seeking after in a partner. Many people are willing to compromise on certain areas for a number of reasons: lack of patience, loneliness, an inability to trust in God, or even a lack of self-confidence and doubting that a) that person still exists and b) that I am good enough for him/her.
If you are married and reading this, then you probably understand what feelings I am talking about in the beginning of this post, taking you back in time to when you met your special someone. If you aren’t, you are probably connecting to these feelings, but in a different way. Please don’t give up hope and compromise. Take this time in your life to grow and develop who you are and build your foundation with God. Marriage is a spiritual domain, and I truly, truly believe if God is not at the center of a relationship, it’s like being on the court without enough players. Maybe that other person is still growing. Maybe you are not ready for them. Pray for yourself. Pray for your future life partner and allow yourself to come to that place where you are happy and healthy just in your own life and relationship with God. Only then can He add on top of a rock solid foundation.
